My Incredible Journey

Spoken by Jane Elizabeth
Transcribed by a student
circa 1997

When I experienced my inner voice, my incredible journey started. I call it an incredible journey because it enfolded many aspects of the new self that I was becoming. I wanted to know God. I desired to know God and I would go to any lengths to know God. That was the desire of my heart, and I realize now after 30 years looking back to the beginning of my journey that that great desire, the desire to know God, that great desire I had in my heart, that desire to become one with God and connect with God was the essence of my soul in this lifetime.

This began when I was five years old when I had sung that song, In the Garden. I recommitted myself to God and I began to recognize that my soul had a journey, had a desire and that I, Jane, was going to fulfill my soul's desire, which was to know God.

In knowing God and experiencing God and serving God in the world was the only thing I could focus on. There wasn't anything more important in my life. I realize now that the one of very important ingredients in wanting to know God, is the heart's desire. The heart has to desire it more than anything else. It's kind of like when we have many, many desires, we desire to have a new house, and a new car and we also desire God. All these things are about 35 and 35 and 40, making up 100 percent of ourselves. We have to have the desire to know God as the most important thing. Because as I look back at that, that was the part of me that was so important to fulfill, was my desire for God.

So, as you go on your journey, check your desires. What is your most sincere desire? Is your most sincere desire to want a company or serve God or be married and have children or be a great musician or whatever it is. It doesn't mean that you can't have those things, but Jesus said, "Desire the kingdom first." The reason he said that is that God fulfills our desires. And if we desire to be rich, we will be rich and if we desire to be a great musician, we will be a great musician whether it will be in this lifetime or the next. God will, indeed, fulfill all our desires.

My desire was one pointed. My desire after my inner voice was to know God. With that desire it just spurred me on. It just catapulted me into wanting more than anything else to know God. The recognition that I had that God knew everything and that God could help me to work through my life was very very important to me, and should be important to every soul on a journey. Every soul on a journey must want God more than they want anything else in order for God to fulfill that one desire for them.

That is very potent! You know yourself, that if you desire a better job, you'll put energies in that and you'll go through the paper and look for a better job and eventually find it.

But when the desire is to know God and that is your great desire, then God will bring forth the people to help you. God will bring forth books for you read. God will bring forth the teacher. Just like if you want a new house, God will bring forth a real estate agent to show you the house. So, once you're connected with your God consciousness, then you work in unison with God and there's no separation of my will and God's will and that becomes one will. Because God wills us all to become one with Him. So, once we become one with Him, all other things are taken care of in their proper order.

After my experience with my inner voice of my mother's death, I was asked to speak to our MethodistChurch which I belonged to on spiritual healing. I knew nothing about spiritual healing. So, I got a book and read about spiritual healing and literally gave a book report at the healing service. They had also invited a lady to come from the UnityChurch in our little town. She and I both took part in a panel discussion about spiritual healing. I first gave my little, more or less, book report and when I got through, she said, "I would like to open up for questions." And she ended answering a lot of questions that the people had. I realized that as I listened to her, that she and I were very in tune in many ways. That spurred and interest in me to get her name and address. I remember going up after to her after the service and asking her if! could call her sometime. She said, "Why, certainly." And gave me her name and address.

Oh, this happened before my mother passed away, now that I think of it. So, I'm getting this a little out of context. I got her name and address before my mother passed away. Then, I found out my mother was so sick and didn't call this girl until after my mother passed away. That was the order of things.

Her name was…, or Sherry, which I called her. She said to me. Oh, let me go back a minute.

I remember the day I called her up. I was very much wanting to do God's will and I remember calling imd saying to God, "I'm going to call this lady. I don't know if this is somebody you want me to be friends with or whatever, but God, I will say that if this is someone you want me to call, then God, let her answer the phone on the first two rings. If, you don't want me to talk to this person, please have that person not home." I remember being so afraid, I was almost shaking making this phone call because I wanted to cooperate with God so bad, and I didn't know whether this was a cooperation or not.

So, she answered the phone and we had a wonderful conversation on the phone. She asked me, did I meditate. Now, this is going back to 1968 and people just didn't meditate in 1968 and talk about it. I said, "Yes, I did." And she said. "So do I." We decided we should get together once a week and meditate together. We set up a time that she and I would meet once a week and meditate together.

I invited her to come to my house and she had a young daughter that was only a year-and-a-half-old and I had my daughter who was three-years-old. It was about 10:30 in the morning when she arrived and, it was so interesting, because my first look at her was that we were very, very different in style and the way we dressed and the way we worked with our children. But that didn't stop us from connecting on a spiritual level. I felt very connected with this lady from the moment I saw her and when she came in and sat down at my kitchen table, my two children got under the table and were playing like little angels. They never made a peep or a sound.

Sherry and I had a mutual vision. As we prayed, we saw the stone rolling away. The stone rolled away and we didn't understand. Suddenly, with that stone rolling away, I began to understand exactly what God was saying. That the Christ self of both of us was going to emerge in this lifetime. We were stunned, we were shocked, truly shocked that we saw a vision together. Nothing like that had ever happened to either one of us.

We decided that God really wanted us together and that we should meditate every day at a specific time at our own homes and we chose 2:00 in the afternoon. So, at 2:00 every day we would meditate and we began to get the same messages from an out-of-body teacher. After we would meditate for a half hour or 45 minutes, I usually got some sort of message or something and I would excitedly call her to find out she had gotten the same message. That bonded us. That bonded us completely. We continued praying together. We eventually put together a little prayer group that we prayed together every Wednesday night as a group and really wanted to grow and to know God.

As we continued praying together, one day, while we were praying together, a great light surrounded us and kind of lifted the two of us out. And in the moment we were lifted up, we each got a message. And the message was, "The veil will be lifted. The veil will be lifted. The veil will· be lifted." We did not know what that meant. When the light subsided, then we simply were dumbfounded. We weren't sure what happened. We didn't know what the veil was. We didn't know how to decipher what was going on. But we knew we had an experience. A deep, free, touching experience and yet we wanted to know what this deep significant experience was going to bring to our life.

Several weeks went by and nothing seemed to happen. We continued meditating. We continued talking to each other on a daily basis and nothing seemed to happen. Then one day, I got a telephone call early in the morning and Sherry said, "Jane, I have a vision of you and I started to cry and I couldn't stop crying and I don't understand it. I don't understand what happened to me." I said, "Well Sherry, I'll come over after the children get up from their nap." I went over to her house and as I walked in the door, she started to cry and she couldn't stop crying again. I said, "Sherry, what is going on with you?" She said, "I'm not sure. I'm not sure at all what's going on except I'm so glad to see you. I'm so glad to see you." And she cried and cried and cried.

I was very impersonal. I wasn't touched by the tears, I was observing. If anything, I would say I was an observer of what was happening. Then I became very centered and questioning. I began to ask Sherry. "What is going on here?" She said, "I don't know, Jane, but I suddenly I want to call you Michael. I'm having hallucinations. I'm seeing you as a man. I'm seeing you as a soldier and the soldier's name is Michael." I said, "Then what is your name?" She said, "Corrine." And I said, "Well, what year is this." She said, "It's long, long ago. Long, long, long ago. Hundreds and hundreds of years ago."

Instead of being shocked, I continued asking questions. "Well, where did Michael go?"

She said, "You left me. You promised to come back and you never came back.

You left me. You left me. And I'm very, very angry at you for leaving me. Why did you leave me and never come back? You promised, you promised me you would come back." Then she looked at me and said, "I have to forgive you. I know that I have to forgive you and I don't know how. Because whatever is going on with me right now, I am anything but forgiving. I am extremely angry that you would go off and leave me and never come back."

I'm very much Jane in a clinical mode and I continue questioning her. Finally, she said, "God, please help me to forgive Michael." She sent to the kitchen, got a bowl of warm water and came out and washed my feet. That was a very humbling experience for me. But that was her act of forgiveness. - When she was through washing my feet, she looked-at me with great love and said, "I do indeed forgive you." With that, she dried her eyes and looked at me and said, "Wow, I'm back to Sherry again and I'm seeing you as Jane."

This was a very disturbing experience that she and I had. We weren't sure at all what was going on. What did this mean? Had some devilish thing happened? Was she insane? Was she schizophrenic? And yet, there was a calmness about us. There was a deep, deep calmness about us. We went on and meditated.

Then Sherry looked at me and said, "Jane, do you believe in reincarnation?" I said, "I don't even know what that means." She said "Well, I haven't read very much about it and I don't know very much about it, but perhaps, perhaps we've been together before." I said, "Well, I have no idea about that. But, I tell you that experience that you had was very, very, revealing and very real."

The next morning I woke up in mediation and as I meditated, I saw a little girl standing behind an iron gate. Oh, it was around the year 1500 and she had blonde curly hair, long ringlets and blue eyes and she had kind of a uniform on. She was standing at the gate and crying and saying, "Mommy, where are you? Mommy, where are you? Come and get me mommy, please mommy, come and get me." This was very disturbing to me because I didn't understand what this was about. But in the same moment I realized I was that little girl who was crying. You can imagine how disturbing that was to me.

I called Sherry up and said, "I had a very, very unusual meditation." All of a sudden I started crying and said, "Oh, I'm so glad you're here. I'm so glad you're here, Sherry." I was having an experience like Sherry had the day before with me. I wasn't sure how to handle all of this emotion that was happening with me. I said, "I've got to come over to your house." So, I went over to her house and I walked in the door and put my arms around her and I cried and said, "Oh, my God, I'm so glad to see you. Oh, I'm so glad to see you."

"Jane, what's going on with you?" I said, "I don't know. I don't know what's the matter with me. I feel very strange. I feel like I'm me, but I'm not me." She said, "Well, that's the way I felt yesterday." I said, "What is going on with us? Has some devilish energy taken over our bodies." She assured me that I would be okay. She was very clinical and asked me very specific questions as I had done to her the day before. But now, I'm in the midst of all of this emotion and I can't think clearly and I can't pull myself out of the emotional state that I was in.

She continued to ask me questions. "Who are you?" I said, "My name Jeannie." Then, I look at her and I said, "And you're my mother and you left me in a convent and promised to come back and you never did. Why didn't you come back to get me, Mother? How could you treat me so badly?" I began to cry, and I began to fret and I began to be very, very upset. Then I realized as Sherry had realized the day before that I needed to forgive my mother. So, I said, "I know I have to forgive you and I don't know how."

I remembered how she had washed my feet and I thought I would wash her feet. Maybe in some way that will help me to forgive her. So, I did. I washed her feet and as I did I asked God to forgive her and I realized after many, many tries that God and I had forgiven my mother who had left me in the convent.

About a half hour later I was okay and my tears were dried and we sat on the sofa just looking at each other and said, "Oh, my God! Oh, my God!" God had told us several weeks ago He was going to lift the veil and the veil He did indeed lift. The veil that God lifted was the veil between the conscious mind and the subconscious mind and, where all the past lives are, in our subconscious. He had pierced the subconscious and leaped out a memory for me of my mother who had left me in the convent and Sherry of the boyfriend she had had that had left her for the service that he was in.

The very first thing that God in His great knowledge knew was that he was going to make the two of us very close, and that we needed to have this opportunity to forgive each other at a very, very deep level so that we could trust each other. Because, as you can see, Corrine would not have trusted Michael and Jeannie would not have trusted her mother. So God had to clear up that karma at the very beginning of our spiritual journey together. Because indeed we were going to have a spiritual journey together and now, 30 years later, I can tell you it was definitely a spiritual journey that needed to be cleaned up at a deep level so that we would trust each other and there would never be any doubt that we would leave each other or that there would be any subconscious reason that I could pull up and not trust her and love her and that she would not trust and love me.

We began our very first lesson on sowing and reaping in karma. As you sow, so shall you reap. God said that in the Bible. As ye sow, so shall ye reap.

After we had that first experience, we began to have other experiences. And these experiences lasted for around seven years. Off and on, we would have experiences of understanding who our children were, who are parents were. Understanding what it meant to have our past lives revealed.

What happened with this revelation was an earth shattering experience to my personality ego self. God began revealing unresolved issues which were affecting my life. The unforgiveness work began. The work continued for years. With each past life I realized that I had not forgiven what needed forgiving. And mostly I realized I had not forgiven myself. I was holding myself in bondage. God had never held me in bondage, but I had held myself in bondage. God is always forgiving us, but I was not forgiving me. I was now in touch with my soul's issues. Not just my personality self issues, but issues at a very, very deep level of understanding.

I started consciously participating in my own soul's evolution. The outcome of this inner work was very, very productive. Because each time I understood one of my past lives, or got to know my soul better, I got clearer with God. God began working through me for other souls too. I began helping others through this process. I became a conscious vehicle for God to work through so that others could be freed.

One of the major outcomes of this revelation was that I began to learn about the fourth dimensional consciousness. I began to experience what it meant to go from the third dimension to the fourth dimension. This took a lot of courage, and if there's one thing I can say about this journey, the spiritual journey, it does take courage. It takes courage to look at your inner self. It takes courage to forgive and I asked God over and over again to please give me the courage to go on. Because some of these things were not fun to look at. And truly when you talk about the dark night of the soul, this is when God starts to show the soul to the self. The self of me was seeing deeper into my self than I ever, ever know possible or even was interested in going. I never knew this existed. I never knew that I had all these different personalities and each time I'd come down incarnation, I took on a totally different personality depending on what I have sowed for in the life before. The truth is, we are always sowing for the future. Where we are now is the sowing for the future lifetime. Once we are free to participate in our own soul's evolution, we start to free ourselves at the soul level.

Well, it looks like I'm almost out of tape here, Fran, so this is probably a good time for me to stop and mail this off to you and continue on. I think I'll talk about what I learned from my past lives and the evolution that took place from knowing about what was in my subconscious. The subconscious is truly a very, very important part of us because it is the storehouse of all our past memories. Those memories have to be in some way cleared out so that we are free to be one with God. As long as those memories are holding us in bondage, or any unforgiveness that we might have for ourselves or anyone else, we are in bondage to reincarnate. So the work that I was doing was very important work in that work is the work of every soul and truly wants to free and liberate itself, is to understand the many aspects of itself so that it can free itself and be one with God. Because our true identity is God and God is very interested in clearing the subconscious so that we can recognize and be one with that ever present knowingness of God which lives within us and is us in every way. Once you recognize that and know that, it will never leave you. God said, "I will never leave you." God meant just that. God is there right now and has never left us. I recognized that God had never left me in any incarnation, that God was always there working with me and loving me. I was my lack and my selfishness and ego that stood in the way of God.

So, I say goodnight to you my dear friend, as we have our wonderful adventure together, not knowing where it's going to take us.